


Misbehave

by McDanigan



Series: All About Love [4]
Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Airports, Angst and Romance, Explicit Language, F/M, Fame, Female Friendship, Female-Centric, Hotels, Im Changkyun | I.M-centric, Mild Sexual Content, Self-Doubt, Soft Im Changkyun | I.M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-08
Updated: 2020-04-08
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:28:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,367
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23536066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/McDanigan/pseuds/McDanigan
Summary: The door to the hotel room closed as Changkyun lazily sat on the sofa and stretched his arm on the backrest. She followed seconds later, annoyed how he looked at ease wherever he was."You got ahead of yourself, I heard," she said, crossing her arms on her chest.He snorted, absentmindedly rubbing his index finger on his upper lip. "Oh yeah?" he asked nonchalantly, his eyes rolling up to finally look at her."You said 'fuck' on broadcast."
Relationships: Im Changkyun | I.M/Original Female Character(s)
Series: All About Love [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1675315
Comments: 3
Kudos: 8





	Misbehave

_ It feels so wrong but it feels so right,  
_ _ Emotions bottle up, got the cap too tight,   
_ _ We could talk it out, but you love to fight, right?  
_ _ Is it misbehaving when we love all night? _

**All passengers traveling to South Korea on Flight KE 261, please have your boarding passes and passports ready for boarding. Flight KE 261, now boarding at Gate 26.  
**

Hye-bin was alternating between staring at her sneakers and taking a nap, when she felt a pair of eyes staring at her. Finally looking up from the ground, she saw a cute baby boy with huge brown eyes and curly hair looking curiously at her. She smiled, making a face to tease the baby, and was shocked when she saw his mother smiling back at her. Hye-bin bowed. The woman was also Korean. 

“Are you alone?” the woman asked.   


“Yes.” She nodded as the woman, who looked to be the same age as her, maybe a bit older, nodded back. 

“Me too. Good thing this guy’s right here,” she said as she looked endearingly towards the baby who had his head tilted to one side as he stared at Hye-bin. “I think he likes you.”

Hye-bin smiled as she leaned forward and waved at him. “ _ Annyeong! _ ”

“My husband just found a job here. We fly when he can’t. Visiting someone?”

She shook her head as she let out a laugh. “I actually just resigned from my job. I’m going back to Korea.”

The woman looked at her anxiously. “Oh I’m sorry!”

“ _ Aniyo,”  _ she said, waving her worries away. “Don’t be.”  _ It's nothing. _

The woman looked genuinely upset as she smiled at Hye-bin with brows furrowed. “What do you do? I mean, your job here?” 

Hye-Bin bit her lip and smiled.  
  


***  


The door to the hotel room closed as Changkyun lazily sat on the sofa and stretched his arm on the backrest.  She followed seconds later, annoyed how he looked at ease wherever he was. 

"You got ahead of yourself, I heard," she said, crossing her arms on her chest.

He snorted, absentmindedly rubbing his index finger on his upper lip. "Oh yeah?" he asked nonchalantly, his eyes rolling up to finally look at her. 

"You said 'fuck' on broadcast." 

He let out a breathy laugh as he flung his hands up and shrugged. "Surprise." 

Changkyun really thought it was a joke. And it all was even to her. When one of their Korean managers called her earlier to confirm if it was true– of videos of IM circulating on Twitter, mouthing "fuck" in reference to "Love U", and of Monbebes rejoicing to the said video– she couldn't help but roll her eyes until it popped out of its socket as she mouthed "fuck" herself. 

Whatever the hell he spoke in front of people, in front of the camera, was his choice. He and the others should be free to do so. Hell, they're in the US for f– Pete's sake. 

But no. Others had always treated them, especially him, as if he was a triggered fire alarm, a huge siren revealing the first thing that came to mind with just a tiny ounce of self-awareness, which all the other staff prayed never to get extinguished. 

Once that tiny ounce got away? Pandemonium.

Changkyun knew as well as her that no amount of words, good or bad, would matter in the West. As long as they put out a good piece of work on the table– and top on charts– they're good.

The other part of the world? Where they came from? Who was supposed to be understanding of them? Not so forgiving. And this was what irked her. The stress. It was all getting inside her head.

"I don't need to remind you every damn time to keep everything well-behaved in your pants, right?" 

"Ooooh," he said, holding his palm over his lips as if he was shocked. "Of course not,  _ maenijeo-nim _ ." 

"And you know I won't be there to write you a good speech once  _ you _ get back, right?" 

At that, his eyes suddenly turned to her, a frown slowly forming on his face. Hye-bin got his attention now.  _ Great.  _

"What?" 

"I'm resigning. I'm going back to Korea." There. She said it. 

He bit his lip before finding a non-existent dirt on the sleeves of his hoodie.

"Why? Someone waiting for you?"

She ignored the remark. "It's none of your business." 

"Bullshit." 

"And you might want to watch your words in front of me." 

Silence slowly crept in like a smoke grenade in the space that separated them. 

The truth was, she was getting tired. So tired. Of the management calling her day and night to monitor what the boys said on broadcast. Of Eshy holding the boys by the balls and leading her around as if she was another dog on a leash. 

Of  _ this.  _ Just what was this situation that appeared like a ticking time bomb in front of her? She didn't know what it was called, but whatever it was, it made her want to jump at the first sign of danger and run as fast as the hell she could from out of here. 

Changkyun placed both hands inside the pocket of his hoodie and looked at her with his usual, almost dead, gaze. "That's it?" 

She nodded, eager to end the conversation. "That's it."    
  


***

The baby's chubby hand was reaching for her as the baby's mother gasped. "Noona's a manager!" 

Hye-Bin laughed. " _ Was _ ,  _ unnie _ ," she said, reaching out to take the baby's hand as well. She ought to feel awkward calling the woman, Ye-ji,  _ that _ . But for the first time after a long time, she felt so refreshed by the normal conversation that when Ye-ji told her to call her  _ unnie _ , Hye-Bin agreed straight away. 

No, she didn't tell her about  _ him _ , but it was better than not talking to anybody about anything at all. Besides, she was a stranger. How freeing it was to talk to someone, someone she didn't know, about her feelings.

"Still!"  _ Unnie _ said, looking at her with the same huge eyes as her baby's. "But are you happy? With your decision?" 

Hye-Bin looked at the baby as he gummed on a rice snack passed on to him earlier by his mother. 

_ Is she happy?  _ She looked at the woman and was about to answer, when she beat her to it. 

"Hye-Bin ssi," she gently crooned, "Can I be honest?" 

She nodded.

"I looked exactly like that when my husband left. There's someone,  _ geurochi _ ?" 

Straightening, she leaned back on her chair and looked at her hands.  
  


***  
  


There was a pause as Changkyun took his right hand out of his hoodie pocket and massaged his temple with his fingers. "We won't talk about us?" he asked, suddenly looking tired.

She straightened her back, urging herself to be firm. "No. I don't like to." 

He smirked, shaking his head as disbelief covered his once gentle face. "That's not what I heard the other night." 

She took the pillow from the bed and threw it towards him. He stood up to face her.

Like two boxers inside the ring, they squared each other up– she, who stood a foot shorter than he, seemed to be at the losing side if only she didn't hold her ground; he would have to be at the winning side. Only if his lips didn't tremble. 

"I didn't ask for this. I asked for a job. I didn't ask for you," she said, not knowing, not caring how she sounded to him as she made her voice louder, trying to cover its breaking.

"I didn't ask for you either, but here you are." 

And here she was, wasn't she? Standing so shamelessly in front of him, her hair in a messy ponytail behind her head, barefaced, wearing shorts and a loose sleeveless shirt–  _ his shirt _ . 

What could she say about that?

"I have nothing to say to you."  _ Wow. Great. Can't she think of anything lamer? _

"Really? Why not start by telling me how afraid you are?" 

She frowned.  _ W-what?  _

"You won't tell me, but I can see it every time we go out. You fear the crowd. You search for cameras." 

"I don—"

"You hate it, but now you're so fucking confused because, for the first time in your life, you're thinking about someone else apart from yourself!"

She pushed him away, but instead of sending him back, she found herself stuck as he pulled her close to him, the familiar warmth enclosing her like fire too close to burning her skin.  _ It felt so wrong, but it felt so right. _

"Let go," she said on gritted teeth.

He didn't. 

"Don't deny it," he whispered. 

She turned her face sideways, closing her eyes. Ashamed. "Don't say that." 

"I will say whatever the fuck I want to say. Whether on broadcast or in this room." 

He was a man with few words, and what few words he had were not always appropriate. She hated it about him– how the few words, although horrible, ugly, were actually raw and true. 

And then she felt his hold loosen on her waist and began caressing her back. "You're a coward, aren't you?" he asked in a gentler voice, a contrast to the harsh, unapologetic question leaving his mouth.

At that, she looked up at him. Really looked at him. At the small wrinkle between his brows that suggested a frown, at the pool of sharp dark eyes that were both the calm and the storm, at his sharp nose, and that slight dip underneath it that pointed right at his lips. 

Her breath became shallow, her ears warm. Not knowing where to place her hands, she settled for his shoulders. And found her hands traveling slowly to his neck to cup his face.

She didn't know why, but as if her soul left her body, she found herself slowly moving closer towards him, found her lips reaching, not for his lips but for his jaw. She didn't know why she did it, just that it felt right. 

He didn't move as she let her lips wander up his right cheek and then to the part beneath his ears that she would usually kiss. 

"Yes," she whispered.

The siren sounded. Pandemonium.  


***  
  


"It's so difficult, right?"  _ Unnie _ , asked, hugging the baby closer to her as she arranged him to sit properly on her lap. "To be away from someone you love, at the same time hate them so much when you're together?" 

Hye-Bin ought to get extremely confused by it, but what Ye-ji _ unnie _ said hit so close to home. She understood. And Hye-Bin could only nod in agreement. 

Just then,  _ unnie, _ leaned forward, trying to reach her to whisper, "But you can't hate each other. Not for long, at least. Young people like you make up like magnets." 

She felt her face turn red. " _ Unnie _ ," she whispered back, placing her palm on her cheek, making sure her temperature hadn't gone up. 

Ye-Ji laughed.   
  


***  


He held her face between his hands, found her lips, and drank from it. She moaned, wanting to disconnect her lips from his to urge him to be gentle. But she couldn't. Or she'd lose him.

It was an unspoken marathon between them, a competition they needed to win. Changkyun caught her lips between his teeth earning a complaint as she worked her lips out of his way and took a bite of her own. No one gave the other time to breathe in case one of them stopped and decided it wasn't worth the fight. 

It really paid to detest shrinking from defeat. No one wanted to lose. Everyone wanted to win. 

She tugged the hem of his hoodie up and over his head as she pushed him back towards the sofa. 

He fell as she fell with him. Reaching for her beneath her loose, black shirt,  _ his  _ shirt, he didn't give her time to think as he pulled it over her head and snapped her bra open. 

As quickly as their lips left each other, they reconnected like two magnets. At that moment, she felt something she hadn't felt before. 

She felt so alive in the state of being wrong. 

Just then, he grabbed her ponytail and pulled her long hair free, exposing her neck to his lips as she slightly arched back, moaning her protest. She gasped as he stood up to carry her with him to the bed, her legs sprawled on both sides of his waist. 

They just wouldn’t have it any other way. 

  
  


The ceiling had never looked so… calming. To her, the small square pattern inside the larger one gave her something to think about apart from the satisfying ache between her legs that were craving to be touched again and again. 

"I'm resigning," she repeated when her breath steadied inside her chest after… making love to him. She didn’t know why, but she needed to hear it again. Needed to convince herself that it was the right thing to do. Needed affirmation from him to tell her that it was alright. He’d be alright.  _ I’m resigning. I’m resigning. I’m resigning.  _

She heard him sigh beside her. A deep sigh that gave her a picture of how tired and helpless he might have been feeling since the day Wonho left, to the day she was leaving. And she understood it. The surrender. Not for peace but for the utter lack of it. 

"Bad girl,” he murmured, his voice deep inside his chest. She closed her eyes, covering them with the back of her hand as he pulled her in his embrace. “ _ My _ bad girl.”

Hye-Bin felt something, like a big block of stone on her chest, restraining air for her to breathe, her throat closing up as if she was drowning from the lack of it. And then she felt it, the slight burning in her eyes as tears fought to spring up slowly, but so painfully from deep inside her. So she fought it, fought it so hard, her throat hurt. She wouldn’t cry. At least not in front of him. 

They stayed that way until she felt a soft snore near her ear. It was barely noticeable if only Changkyun hadn’t placed himself so close to her. 

She looked to her right towards the digital clock, the dots between the numbers blinking on the bedside table. **03:18**.

She left his embrace. And saw a line of dried tears from his closed eyes, down to his nose. 

Hye-Bin hurried, afraid she’d lose heart.   


***  
  


_ Unnie  _ frowned towards her, a pout forming on her lips. “You left just like that?”

**_Passengers for Flight KE 261 to South Korea, please go to Gate 26._ **

Hye-Bin smiled, locking her hands together as she stretched her arms in front of her. She nodded.

“That’s not good.” 

“I know,” she said, sighing apologetically as the baby blew a bubble towards her. “I have no choice.

Ye-ji  _ unnie _ shook her head, looking as if even she was getting annoyed. “The way I see it, the choice is up to you. I hope you don’t mind me asking, but...” she paused as she saw her toothless baby boy gumming her hands. She wiped the baby’s mouth with a soft towel before kissing the top of his head. “Are they famous?”

She laughed. “Stinking famous, it’s irritating.”

_ Unnie _ chuckled with her. “What about the others? Do they have, you know, partners?”

She paused. Right until then she didn’t think it was dangerous to share confidential information to a stranger, but why did she have to look and sound so trustworthy? 

As if she heard Hye-bin's thoughts, Ye-ji  _ unnie _ sighed. “Come on, Hye-Bin ssi. I’m happily married, I’m getting older, and I have two sons, one is my husband! Do you think I’d have the energy to tell your secret to anyone?”

She giggled, shaking her head. Alright. To hell with it. She nodded. “Yes." _The other one’s actually married,_ she wanted to say but thought against it.

“See?” Even the baby boy jumped at her mother’s suddenly loud voice. They were talking quietly and the sudden loud sound could easily scare the baby. Hye-Bin reached out across her to give him a gentle pat on his head to calm him.  _ Unnie _ laughed shyly. “Sorry. It’s just that,” she sighed. “You know what I think?”

Hye-Bin shook her head, taking the soft towel to wipe the baby’s mouth again. She made it her job to take another rice snack and give it to him.

“I think it’s all up in your head. You know from the start it's not going to be easy, but you tried to make it work, right? You don’t have to do everything all at once. You just need to take steps together, small steps, to find that little bit of—" She paused, thinking of the right word until she got it. "—safe, silent space where you can both be yourselves. Look,” she smiled as she held her hand. “Think about it this way. If your guy’s in the music industry, wait, how old is he?”

“Twenty-four.”

“ _ Geurochi _ . So he’d have 10 more years, 20 if they’re so stinking famous as you said. What then?” 

She frowned not knowing where she was going with this. She shook her head, honest that she didn’t know what to answer. 

_ Unnie _ closed her eyes and sighed, visibly finding it difficult to explain to her.

“Is he Korean?”

“Yes.”

“So he’s basically going to the military after— that’s so sad,” she paused, “that’s 40 years of living alone, Hye-Bin ssi. And then you’ll both find yourselves so old wondering what you should’ve done instead. And by then you'll just…" Unnie trailed off, shaking her head, "...wonder.”

Tears that were bottled up inside her chest, all broke to the last minute. She tried to hold it in but failed. 

“It’s not going to be easy, but, you get to be with him every day and call it work, you know. Not all of us can do that." 

She sniffed and then laughed, wiping her eyes when she noticed Ye-ji  _ unnie _ suddenly looking past her head, her eyes wide as if she'd seen a ghost.

Unnie gasped. **_Once again, Ladies and Gentlemen, Flight KE 261 to South Korea is closing doors in—_** “Oh my god!" she exclaimed, "Hye-Bin ssi, there's my husband." 

**_—10 minutes. Passengers must be onboard at this time. Flight KE 261 to South Korea is onboarding. Thank you._ **

Hye-Bin nodded and smiled as Unnie ran to her husband with their baby kicking, hands flailing, as if even he knew who it was that they were going to meet. 

_ Unnie _ came up to her a few minutes later and introduced her as her friend. She smiled as she bowed. “Sorry, I distracted her,” she joked, helping her to strap the baby on her chest, before giving the baby bag to her husband. 

“No! Of course not. It’s so nice meeting you! Say bye, Eunjun-ah!”

She gave the baby a kiss and waved at them as Ye-Ji _ unnie's _ husband took her baggage and left. 

“Remember what I said!” 

She nodded with a smile as she waved back until they disappeared. 

Hye-bin sighed as she walked back to her seat and closed her eyes. 

She stayed that way, for how long, she didn't know how. She listened as voices, different languages, blended together, which should have sounded chaotic but were, in a way, music to her ears. Ah to be unknown, to be part of the crowd and not shy away from it.

How afraid was she and how much more difficult was it for him? 

**_This is the final boarding call for passenger Lee Hye-Bin flying to South Korea on Flight KE 261. Your flight is ready to leave. Please go to Gate 26 immediately. The doors of the plane will close in 5 minutes. Final boarding call for passenger Lee Hye-Bin. Thank you._ **

Guess she'd have to find out. She took her baggage and headed for the exit.

_ And we only break up,   
_ _ Just so we can make up  
_ _ And I can hear you call my name  
_ _ I love it when we misbehave. _

  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Hello!
> 
> I don't know, but there's something intimate about writing in the middle of the night about a traveler, surrounded by this crowd of people, while she's all alone in an airport. 
> 
> More than a story about Monsta X' _maknae_ (who we all secretly love **DON'T DENY IT!** ), I'd say, this is more of a story about Hye-Bin, an original female character just trying to make a living in the music industry but was given a whole other form of headache hehe. 
> 
> Aaaa! We got Shownu, Jooheon, and Minhyukie left for this series (HELP! HAHA). If you got any prompts or you want to assign a song from All About Luv to any of these members, please feel free to leave me a comment! 
> 
> Hoping you're all safe (and inside your homes) during this pandemic. I hope we can talk more about love even inside the comfort of our homes.


End file.
